One of the spiritual sites that is part of my daily meditation is one that’s called In the Rooms. They email a lovely reading every day. The reading today is right on track with the idea of each one of us learning to love ourselves as we are. Mind-Body Connection My state of mind affects my body. Wherever thought travels, a chemical travels with it. The chemicals in my body are then affected by my thoughts. This means that who I am on the inside affects who I am on the outside. I am not just guessing at this, it is not some New Age notion that neurochemical and physical makeup are interconnected. My state of mind and my level of inner spirit have the power to impact and improve me physically. Today I will affirm within me that I have a beautiful and healthy body and mind. I will thank a Higher Power for giving me a healthy, strong and beautiful body. I will do this as often as I can remember to do it throughout my day. My body is beautiful, strong and healthy. The same is true of the face, which is shaped and formed according to the content of the mind and soul, and the same is again true of the proportions of the human body. Thus can this member of astronomy describe each kind of soul. For the sculptor of Nature is so artful that he does not fashion the soul to fit the form, but the form to fit the soul. Paracelsus, 16th century physician, alchemist
Archive for October, 2011
For many of us, perhaps the hardest thing of all is to believe that “I am a good person.” We can climb mountains, work hard, acquire many skills, act ethically – but truly feel that one is good deep down? Nah! Every once in awhile, I get a marvelous article from my friend, Rick Hansen. Feeling like a really good person is always one of my goals and Rick gives some good thoughts on how to do this! We end up not feeling like a good person in a number of ways. For example, I once knew a little girl who’d been displaced by her baby brother and fended off and scolded by her mother who was worn down and busy caring for an infant. This girl was angry at her brother and parents, plus lost and disheartened and feeling cast out and unloved. She’d been watching cartoons in which the soldiers of an evil queen attacked innocent villagers, and one day she said sadly, “Mommy, I feel like a bad soldier.” Later in life – whether in school or adulthood – shamings, moral indictments, religious chastising, and other criticisms come in many shapes and sizes. Feeling morally compromised – the essence of not believing you’re a good person – is fed by related though different experiences of worthlessness, inadequacy, and unlovableness: as my ranch-born father would say, “feeling like you’re the runt of the litter.” I’ve also known people – including myself – who have done bad things, or said them or thought them. Things like hitting an animal, risking the lives of their children while driving buzzed, being mean to a vulnerable person, stealing from a store, feeling contemptuous, or cheating on a partner. These don’t need to be felony offenses to make one feel guilty or ashamed. In effect, to simplify, it’s as if the psyche has three parts to it: one part says, “you’re not good”; another part says, “you’re good”; and a third part – the one we identify with – listens. The problem is that the critical, dismissive, shaming voice is usually much louder than the protecting, encouraging, valuing one. Sure, there is a place for healthy remorse. But shining through our lapses of integrity, no matter how great, is an underlying and pervading goodness. Yes it may be obscured; I am not letting myself or others – from panhandlers to CEOs and Presidents – off the moral hook. But deep down, all intentions are positive, even if they are expressed problematic ways. When we are not disturbed by pain or loss or fear, the human brain defaults to a basic equilibrium of calm, contentment, and caring. And in ways that feel mysterious, even numinous, you can sense profound benevolence at your core. Really, the truth, the fact, is that you are a good person. (Me, too.) When you feel deep down like a bad soldier – or simply not like a good person – you’re more likely to act this way, to be casually snippy, self-indulgent, selfish, or hurtful. On the other hand, when you feel your own natural goodness, you are more likely to act in good ways. Knowing your own goodness, you’re more able to recognize it in others. Seeing the good in yourself and others, you’re more likely to do what you can to build the good in the world we share together. 1. Take in the good of feeling cared about – When you have a chance to feel seen, listened to, appreciated, liked, valued, or loved: take a dozen seconds or more to savor this experience, letting it fill your mind and body, sinking into it as it sinks into you. 2. Recognize goodness in your acts of thought word and deed – These include positive intentions, putting the brakes on anger, restraining addictive impulses, extending compassion and helpfulness to others, grit and determination, lovingness, courage, generosity, patience, and a willingness to see and even name the truth whatever it is. You are recognizing facts; create sanctuary in your mind for this recognition, holding at bay other voices, other forces, that would invade and plunder this sanctuary for their own agenda (such as the internalization of people you’ve known who made themselves feel big by making you feel small). 3. Sense the goodness at the core of your being – This is a fundamental honesty and benevolence. It’s there inside everyone, no matter how obscured. It can feel intimate, impersonal, perhaps sacred. A force, a current, a wellspring in your heart. 4. See the goodness in others – Recognizing their goodness will help you feel your own. Observe everyday small acts of fairness, kindness, and honorable effort in others. Sense the deeper layers behind the eyes, the inner longings to be decent and loving, to contribute, to help rather than harm. 5. Give over to goodness – Increasingly let “the better angels of your nature” be the animating force of your life. In tricky situations or relationships, ask yourself, “Being a good person, what’s appropriate here?” As you act from this goodness, let the knowing that you are a good person sink in ever more deeply. Enjoy this beautiful goodness, so real and so true. By the way, I’m a really good person too! — Jeannie
The Whole Foods Diabetic Cookbook ( Paperback ) By Patricia Bertron Buy new : $10.23 52 used and new from $2.71 Customer Rating: First tagged “vegan cookbook” by Tom Miller “miller’s garden” Customer tags: diabetes (3), whole foods (3), vegan cookbook , vegetarian diabetic cookbook
The Whole Foods Diabetic Cookbook ( Paperback ) By Patricia Bertron Buy new : $10.23 52 used and new from $2.71 Customer Rating: First tagged “vegan cookbook” by Tom Miller “miller’s garden” Customer tags: diabetes (3), whole foods (3), vegan cookbook , vegetarian diabetic cookbook
Go Veg! The Cookbook ( Kindle Edition ) By Tanya Dormevil Buy new : $2.99 Customer Rating: First tagged “vegan cookbook” by Shyla Raven Customer tags: health (2), vegan cookbook , vegetarian , cookbook , vegan cooking , cook book , vegetarian cooking , tanya dormevil , vegan recipes , vegan , vegan cookbooks , vegetarian cookbook
I was sent this by my dear friend from British Columbia, Tracy Lambeth. It is wonderful! A while back, at the entrance of a gym, there was a picture of a very thin and beautiful woman. The caption was “This summer, do you want to be a mermaid or a whale?” The story goes, a woman (of clothing size unknown) answered the following way: “Dear people, whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, seals, curious humans), they are sexually active and raise their children with great tenderness. They entertain like crazy with dolphins and eat lots of prawns. They swim all day and travel to fantastic places like Patagonia, the Barents Sea or the coral reefs of Polynesia. They sing incredibly well and sometimes even are on cds. They are impressive and dearly loved animals, which everyone defend and admires. Mermaids do not exist. But if they existed, they would line up to see a psychologist because of a problem of split personality: woman or fish? They would have no sex life and could not bear children. Yes, they would be lovely, but lonely and sad. And, who wants a girl that smells like fish by his side? Without a doubt, I’d rather be a whale. At a time when the media tells us that only thin is beautiful, I prefer to eat ice cream with my kids, to have dinner with my husband, to eat and drink and have fun with my friends. We women, we gain weight because we accumulate so much wisdom and knowledge that there isn’t enough space in our heads, and it spreads all over our bodies. We are not fat, we are greatly cultivated. Every time I see my curves in the mirror, I tell myself: “How amazing am I ?! “
I have to mention again the article in the New York Times that discusses insurance companies in California appealing a decision in the lower courts that would make insurance companies pay for eating disorders treatment, and other mental conditions just as they pay for medical treatment. I’ve also read a several articles where a couple of psychologists maintained that people with eating disorders can be treated just as well on an out-patient basis. Have they done a thorough literature review on the recovery rates of people from eating disorders? Stuart Agras tells us that only 32% of all people who have had treatment are eating disorder free at the end of a year. This included inpatient, residential, and outpatient therapy. Anorexia is the leading cause of death in young women. 20% of people with anorexia will die. I see the women who admit to Mirasol for treatment. A good number of these women wouldn’t live if they didn’t receive the care they need. A couple of days in the hospital for refeeding doesn’t cut it. I’m talking about treating them nutritionally, physically, emotionally — real mind/body treatment because that is the way someone recovers from an eating disorder much more quickly than they would in outpatient therapy. I remember the court case in Minnesota where Kitty Westin sued Blue Cross of Minnesota because they refused treatment for her daughter, Anna, who died from an eating disorder. Anna was only 16. Now Minnesota pays for eating disorder treatment. A few lawsuits that would cost the insurance companies $1,000,000 or more will get their attention and paying for treatment will seem much cheaper in comparison to paying out large amounts in lawsuits. Insurance companies are making huge profits. They need to care for the women in our society who suffer from these conditions. We all need to get behind the lawsuits. We need to write or call our congressmen. We need to shout loud and clear. We need to let people know that we will not accept this kind of treatment — or should I say non-treatment? Grrrrrr………….
Nine Reasons Not to Get Treatment I love to answer the phones at Mirasol and speak with people who are calling us for information. Some people have been to several different treatment centers and are old pros at the admission process. Some people have never been to treatment but have been seeing a therapist. Other people are simply out there, very ill, and they’ve never attempted to get any help. When I talk to people about previous treatment or lack of previous treatment, I get the comment, “I don’t think I’m sick enough for treatment.” They have an unbelievable list of reasons they shouldn’t get treatment. See if you can identify with anything on this list: 1. I don’t want to. Wow, what a concept. I think I’ll wait. I’d rather have a root canal! 2. I’m not sick enough. Everyone (yes, everyone) has used this excuse at some point. Other variations include: a. I’m not thin enough. My weight is okay. I’ll be the heaviest person in treatment. b. My labs are okay. I’m really healthy. c. I don’t have serious health consequences. d. If it were really a problem, my spouse / doctor / friends / parents would have said something. 3. I can’t take the time off from work – This excuse is not unreasonable, but what about having a life-threatening disorder? What about getting fired from your job because you can’t do the work? What about getting treatment, coming back, and doing super work for your boss? You need to be around to do your job and to do a good job. 4. It’s too expensive – Clients say this and parents say this! However, there are ways to find money. Some treatment centers have sliding scales. There are free, research-run programs in some areas. I know of a behavioral health lender that has very reasonable terms for the borrower. Many other people borrow money from family members. I remember one patient I had who borrowed $5000 from 10 different family members. Still, finances are a barrier for many people. 5. I had treatment before, and it didn’t work – This is another excuse that I hear frequently from people. How about saying this? “I didn’t fail treatment, but the kind of treatment I had failed me!” 6. I can do this on my own — This is another one that everyone has used, usually to put off therapists, doctors, and parents. If you could do it on your own, you would have done it by now. 7. There’s no treatment near me — You’ll have to be creative. You can find treatment of some kind, even if you’re going to AA or Al-Anon meetings. 8. I’m too old – Adolescent females are not the only people in the universe who have eating disorders. At Mirasol, my oldest client was a woman who was 74! More and more older women are showing up with eating disorders. 9. Shame — So many people with eating disorders feel a lot of shame. “What will everyone say if they know I’m going for treatment?” It’s none of their business first of all. You tell them you’re going to a retreat center. Sometimes it seems like jumping off of a cliff without any idea of where you’ll land! But take a risk and do it! There are lots of reasons to NOT seek treatment, and many of them are valid. However, reasonable or not, they are still excuses and they help keep you sick.
Naturally Skinny: 100 Organic Recipes Under 350 Calories! ( Paperback ) By Samantha Brown Buy new : $11.48 15 used and new from $11.25 Customer Rating: First tagged “vegan cookbook” by Carol Mathers Customer tags: vegan cookbook , healthy eating , cookbook , cooking , vegan , hungry girl , diet , low calorie , low fat
