This poem was written by one of our clients. We share it with her permission in hopes that it will inspire others to seek treatment and support. Should you have any questions or comments about this post, please email
Archive for September, 2011
Easy and Meatless Recipes for the Single Vegan ( Kindle Edition ) By Alice Di Gioia Buy new : $5.99 195 used and new from $5.95 First tagged “vegan cookbook” by Alice Di Gioia Customer tags: vegan cookbook , meatless recipes , cooking for one , vegan cooking , single vegan , meatless cooking , vegan recipes , easy recipes , easy cooking , single serve , single vegetarian , vegetarian cookbook
I love this post by Dr. Sarah Ravin on tips for parents who are sending or considering sending their college aged child to school. Check it out below: Leaving the Nest
How to Help a Friend I have always tried not to use another person’s material when writing my blog, but this article is so exceptional, I need to share it with everyone!! It comes from a website, www.eatingforlife.org. What to do if you think someone may have an eating disorder Eating disorders are not about the food. There is always a deeper problem that is causing the person to focus so intently on food. The eating disorder is the outward manifestation signaling that there is an inner problem (e.g. self-esteem, family issues, depression, anxiety). An eating disorder is a person’s attempted solution to that problem. The eating disorder will begin to go away when the inner problem is addressed, and usually counseling is helpful in this process. Make sure you approach the person one-on-one. If a group of you is concerned, it is very important that one person be chosen to talk with the friend. Group confrontation can make a person feel “ganged up on” and can cause a friend to feel betrayed, as if everyone has been talking about them. The goal is to support your friend, and often a group confrontation can leave a person feeling like they have been betrayed by their support system. Make a plan to approach your friend in a private place. Try to choose a non-stressful environment where you will have time to talk at length, if necessary. Present what you have observed and what your concerns are in a non-confrontational, caring way. Tell him or her that you are worried because of what you have noticed and that you would like to offer some help. Stay away from saying “we’ve been talking and are worried” – focus on what you yourself have seen, it is less threatening. (Friends who are too angry or hurt to talk supportively should not be the ones to confront.) Offer human company and empathy. You don’t need to agree with the person’s feelings or stance. There is a place for challenge, advice, information, pep talks, jokes, and confrontation. Generally, that place is after she or he feels her or his experience is understood and accepted for what it is. Listen carefully and non-judgmentally. Give the person time to hear what you have to say and to verbalize their feelings. Ask clarifying questions and then accept whatever they have to say without judgment. Encourage him or her to talk about their feelings. Do not argue about whether or not there is a problem. Power struggles are not helpful. You could say, “I hear what you are saying and I hope that you are right and that this is not a problem. But I am still concerned about what I have seen and heard because I care about you.” (It is best not to say what other people feel or what they have noticed. Speak with “I” statements.) Do not lay guilt trips, like “Look what you are doing to your family or roommates”. We are each responsible for our own feelings. Bear in mind that people with eating disorders yearn to know that someone could both know the worst about them and love them and care about them anyway. If the person denies the problem, becomes angry, or refuses treatment, understand that this is often a part of the illness. They have a right to refuse (UNLESS their life is in danger). You may feel helpless and angry. You might say, “I know you can refuse to go for help, but that won’t stop me from being concerned. I may bring this up again later – maybe we can talk about it then.” Follow through on this, and other promises you might make. Your friend may need time to process what you have said to them. Don’t expect an immediate positive response, the important thing is to follow through and be consistent. Provide information and resources for treatment. Make sure that you brush up on your knowledge of eating disorders before you talk to your friend, and be sure to offer resources to your friend. Encourage her or him to see a counselor, nutritionist, or physician and offer to go with them to the first appointment. Remember that recovery is a long process. It may take a while before your friend is feeling better and it is important for you to remain supportive throughout the entire recovery process. Do not try to be the hero or rescuer – you may be resented. If you do the best you can to help on several occasions and the person does not accept it, stop. This does not mean stop being aware of their behavior, but you have done all it is reasonable to do. Eating disorders are stubborn problems, and treatment is most effective when the person is truly ready for it. You may have planted a seed that helps them get ready. Make sure you get support for yourself. It can be difficult to live with someone who is dealing with an eating disorder. Get the information and support that you need. For continuing support of your friend: Remember that she or he is more than the eating disorder. Don’t let it become an identity – focus on his or her other characteristics that make them great. The more you help him or her identify his or her positive attributes, the easier it will be to let go of the “eating disorder” identity. Don’t be afraid of conflicts or problems. These areas need to be brought out into the open, not hidden. Be sure to keep lines of communication open. Do not focus on weight gained or lost. Focus more on their mental state. If you say, “you look thin” you are focusing on appearance and feeding into their behavior. If you say, “you look healthy” she or he may think you are saying, “you look fat.” Don’t focus on achievements – grades, promotions, etc. Instead, talk about his or her inner qualities and strengths. Set an example – be good to yourself and she or he will see that it is possible. Stay positive! People do recover from eating disorders. Many people who recover acknowledge the importance of friends who believed in them and kept trying to reach out to them. Women’s Resource Center Boston College
One of our challenges when working with both adults and adolescents suffering from eating disorders is educating their family. So often family members have a limited understanding of the disorders their loved ones are suffering from and this can be an obstacle in the family system being an asset in recovery. Here is some very basic eating disorder information provided by National Institute of Mental Health. Once a friend or family member understands some of these simple facts, then they have the opportunity with the guidance of a professional to understand the underlying factors leading to eating disorders. Eating Disorder (NIMH)
http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/releases/232109.php This article hit me on two different levels. 1- In our struggles with insurance companies I often find myself wondering how they fail to realize that investing in solid treatment will not only lead to lowering the suffering of the individual we are working with, but also in the long run save insurance companies money in the long term health problems which result from eating disorder behaviors. 2-This study states “that obesity prevention programs that stigmatize obesity or create a sense of blame can actually contribute to eating disorders.” Goes along with awareness of weight bias.
If you’re looking for inspiration please take some time to learn more about Jenni Schaefer . Check out her website for details about her books, Life Without Ed and Goodbye Ed, Hello Me , as well as song lyrics, blog posts, future speaking engagements, and helpful links on eating disorders and recovery.
This article quotes an interesting study in Journal of the American Dietetic Association. Raises some interesting questions on the motives of vegetarianism in adolescents. I think at Mirasol we do an excellent job of respecting dietary choices of clients, while at the same time encouraging individuals to examine their motives for vegetarianism, veganism, macrobiotic etc.
We are excited to tell you about a current publication by CCED’s Drs Anita Federici and Lucene Wisniewski in A Collaborative Approach to Eating Disorders edited by June Alexander and Janet Treasure. The article, titled “Integrating dialectical behavioral therapy and family-based treatment for multidiagnostic adolescent patients”,
This article details a recent court case in California where the courts sent a clear message that insurance companies attempt to limit residential treatment for individuals suffering from eating disorders is not legal. http://abcnews.go.com/Health/MindMoodNews/anorexia-ruling-affect-coverage-mental-illness/story?id=14419120 This is a struggle we are engaged with every day at Mirasol. It seems like in the past few years insurance companies are tightening their reins, but this case sends the message that the court system will enforce mental illness parity. Especially in light of studies indicating that eating disorders have the highest mortality of any mental illness.
